“Get Over It”
The unfortunate truth about our world is that bad things sometimes happen. Another unfortunate truth is that people don’t always know how to handle when bad things happen. I can’t count how many times I have heard that someone needs to “just get over” whatever happened to them. If I’m being honest, before 2014, I would spew the same toxic rhetoric.
As some of you may know, in 2014, approximately 16 months after losing my virginity, I contracted Type I genital herpes. My whole world crashed around me as I experienced the death of the girl I never appreciated. I began to understand the damaging effects of the phrase, “get over it.” While to my recollection, I don’t remember anyone saying those specific words to me, I do remember feeling from others and myself that I should get “get over this.”
However, the more I tried to act as if the situation didn’t affect me, the worse my mental health became. Eventually, my mental health became so bad that I cried in response to every joke and criticism directed toward me. It took years to finally release my anger, my sadness and my disappointment to God and to find a therapist.
1 Peter 5:7 (NLT) says: “Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.”
If you have been through something traumatic, I can relate. It’s hard. You feel ostracized, abandoned and more. But, I’m here to remind you that God will never leave you nor forsake you (Hebrews 13:5; Deuteronomy 31:8). There is no emotion too big for God, even if you’re mad at Him. He can work with honesty and He can heal from there. Matthew 11:28 (NLT) says: “Then Jesus said, ‘Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.’” The Bible also says: “And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:7). In addition to seeking God, I recommend visiting a Christian therapist. The Bible advises us to have wise counsel and I believe therapists fall under this category.
If you haven’t underwent a serious traumatic incident, let me advise you to be kind; try to see the situation from the other person’s perspective before you speak. If you can’t say anything nice after that, I also advise you the same as Thumper’s mother in Bambi, “If can’t say something nice, don’t say nothing at all,” and I can assure you saying, “Get over it,” is not nice at all.
Whether you have experienced something traumatic or not, we should all express the fruit of the Spirit and be kind and gentle.
